TERRI HOFSTETTER INTUITIVE SOUL GUIDE
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Do you think you made a wrong turn in your life?

3/1/2022

 
I’ve been doing a lot of tracking of my life lately, observing stepping stones and turning points over the decades. I started to think of all the ‘what ifs’ had I made another decision on various steps in my life, where would I be now?
 
This time, it revolved around my intermittent (or more like spasmodic) college journey; attending night classes whenever I had the money, not choosing a major at first, but then switching later. 
 
Then I remember my friend Lora who I lost track of about 20 years ago. We were just out of high school, having gone to different schools, attending personal growth workshops in the evenings, and sharing rides. Our relationship centered around casual conversations about the new David Bowie album, our life’s perspectives, and if there’s life on other planets (in case we ran out of topics) We grew close and eventually built a bond. 
 After about a year, she was off to college, to major in psychology. Cool. I hoped to eventually go that direction, too. The university was 2 hours away, so once or twice during the school year, I went to visit her on a weekend once she lived off-campus. 
 
Toward the end of her sophomore year, she discovered that she had received the wrong course information to major in experimental psychology and work in psychoanalysis as she wanted. We had long talks as I listened and supported her, one Friday night, in particular, we weighed over her frustration while sitting in the park in mid-May. She would either have to repeat a year, tracking back courses she missed, or change to a major that fit the courses she had so far. She didn’t want to use more of her parents’ money. 
 
She ended up going toward the social work direction, which, after graduation revealed that it would be a life of visiting homes of severe welfare cases such as drug addicts which left her depleted and frustrated about her future. I know now that we have to follow what lights us up to stay on our soul path and feel successful and self-actualized. 
 
I learned from her experience and floated around taking courses I liked when I had time, or not at all. I didn’t want to waste my money or borrow money from my parents to pursue a degree that I may not want 4 years later. 
 
I also developed some limiting beliefs through this:

You probably won’t get to do what you really want in life. 

You will have to compromise with what you choose for a livelihood.

Life sucks. (I just made this one up)

You won’t make it anywhere in life without the right degree.

 
With all of that, I made what I believed were some huge mistakes on my career path – well, I never really had a career path. I shuffled through life, hoping to get somewhere eventually, but not having much faith in getting ahead. There were also oodles of limiting beliefs I inherited from my parents. 

But now, looking back, it wasn’t that bad. In fact, just a couple of years ago, I realized that I am exactly where I need to be; and that not getting a major was not a mistake after all. 

I would have spent all my time preparing for possibly a career that wouldn’t fit me – as Lora did. I would have possibly committed myself to an inappropriate career for myself and might be still stuck in it. I might have made more money over the last three decades, but not necessarily happy doing the thing that earned it. 

 
In the big scope of things, the journey I made led me to where I am now, and most of the steps along the way were instrumental in my journey – even the screw-ups. 

More than anything, I learned how to help others go back and see their lives as an intricate stone path guiding them exactly where they need to be. In that journey, we can pull up little gems that complete the package of their perfect life. 

You didn’t screw up. Your intuition is leading you to exactly where you need to be. Once you go back and pull out the gems, retrace all those magical moments (even the ones that don’t seem magical right now), and put it all together, it will shine so clearly. 
 
I will talk more about this, but if you want to know more now, you can schedule a chat with me here.



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Animal Souls and Psychics

2/11/2022

 
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When I was 13 or 14, I attended confirmation classes at church. They ran through the school year every Wednesday at 6 pm, except on school holidays. I didn’t enjoy it, but I knew it was a requirement to be a member of the church, which was very important in my family. Halfway through, I wondered if I really wanted to be a member. Something deep inside gave me the feeling that none of the structured religious training resonated with me in my soul. 
I realize now, that it’s all part of conformity, and the institution is provided to train adults to follow the rules and accept that the church is there to control our lives. If the institution fails to keep us controlled, it would collapse from within. At any rate, I wanted to make my parents happy, so I went along with it. 

Somewhere along the line, the subject of souls came up. I was told by a gleeful 80 year old pastor that humans are the only members of the animal kingdom that have souls and that’s what makes us special. That statement immediately struck a nerve. Wait, why wouldn’t God give his beloved creatures souls? All we had been taught in Sunday School was about Jesus blessing the animals and they were here to serve us. So why wouldn’t they have souls?

 “You see,” explained Pastor Schulz, “If they had souls, they would be able to think – and you know animals can’t think...” 
 “Sure they can….” The conversation ended about there, with his voice getting stern and his temples bulging. That was the end of that. 
 On the drive home, I told Mom. She said that although he was old school and had traditional beliefs, and even though she agreed with me, she felt it was best to keep my feelings to myself. With that, I was trained to keep my spiritual beliefs in the proverbial closet.

I enjoyed the confirmation itself, with the ceremony and rite of passage, it probably touched me as a step toward adulthood. Serving communion and lighting the candles as an acolyte was a responsibility I honored. However, looking back, it was the first step toward my gradual wander away from the church in my late teens. 


The confirmation class timed coincidentally with the yoga classes that I started attending at age 13 and continued through my late teens. We had already started meditation practice with the class. Of course, I never told the pastor. 

The Unity Church was a few blocks away from the yoga center. It was the bookstore there where I discovered wonderful Unity books, and a few years later, the newly published You Can Heal Your Life, by Louise Hay. You can imagine the doors that opened for me. 

When I was 17, I found a metaphysical center that taught courses in Astrology, Numerology, Tarot, and various courses about chakras and various other spiritual topics influenced by the Theosophist society and the works of Alice Bailey and Edgar Cayce. The director of the center, Anna Horton, was Methodist and a non-denominational minister, as women were not ordained as ministers in the Methodist church at that time. It felt comforting to me as a connection to the church without the rigidity. I told Anna about the experience with Pastor Schulz. “You don’t have to worry about that here,” she chuckled, reaching down and scratching her dog’s ears, “Right Wolfie?” 

I learned to read the tarot from Anna, and enjoyed the new world of intuition. She held workshops with psychic readers who channeled and read psychometry. I was curious but somewhat apprehensive at that point. Little did I know where I would end up in 35 years. 

Through Anna, I heard about the Universal Light of Christ Church. Rev. Pat did psychic readings after their church services. Looking back, I see her as amazingly gifted. I learned that Pat offered psychic fairs and she offered me the opportunity to participate. I slowly built up confidence. Sometimes the attendance was low, and the readers passed the time by reading for each other. I learned so much from them. Many encouraged me, but being a beginner, and half their age, I didn’t have the confidence. I dealt with compare and despair issues, which carried into my early coaching days as offering my intuitive readings 30 years later. 

 Pat always saw my light shining. I could see hers. 




Who are your ultimate mentors?  Using Archetypes to develop spiritually.

5/12/2021

 
When I was in high school, my psychology teacher had us write down the names of 8 people, living or dead, who we would like to have for a dinner party. I don't remember who they all were, but I know John Lennon, Henry Thoreau, and Jacques Cousteau were on the list. 

They were important in my mind at the moment. It was 2 years after John Lennon was murdered, I had just read On Walden Pond and I was always fascinated by Jacques Cousteau's achievements in marine research and conservation.  I don't remember the rest of the exercise, or how any of the other students responded. 

I've used elements of this exercise in my personal and spiritual development.  A few years later, I had changed the list a few times, adding spiritual leaders, deep thinkers, historical figures, and artists.

I've taken this exercise a step further. A few of my mentors have a 'hero's wall', with photos of people who have influenced them over the years; people they look to for inspiration. Wayne Dyer said that he kept the photos on the wall in his study and referred to them daily. 
Now, I keep my ultimate mentors in mind, to ask for support and call on when I need inspiration or advice.

I find this a helpful tool; I have an entire entourage of mentors that I can pull up at a moment's notice. Of course, I still use John Lennon for reference, but I've added Mother Theresa, St. Francis, Joan of Arc, Albert Einstein, John Steinbeck, Martin Luther King, Michelangelo, Pythagoras, Hildegard von Bingen, and more recent mystics and great minds for assistance when I get stuck. They are always available for us, whether or not they appear directly, the essence they have left behind is available for us in the form of wisdom.

Many recent light workers refer to this as connecting to our board of directors. I like to call them my ultimate mentors. It feels more like sitting at dinner or on a park bench having a chat.

Lately, I've been connecting to my dead rock stars for help in my creativity.
Freddie Mercury reminds me to be authentic to my true nature.
Jimi Hendrix helps me to experiment with new ideas.
David Bowie tells me to decide what I want and not to accept less than my standards
John Lennon inspires me to hold my vision.
Above all, I reach out to Janis Joplin when I want to remember to reach into my soul, be genuine, and not compare to anyone else.

Early in my coaching practice, I met with a fellow coach as we practiced a metaphoric tool. The tool has always been helpful to find insight we don't always have access to readily. We pulled up some of her favorite artists. Salvador Dali reminded her to tune into her own creativity and individual style for inspiration. He had a great message for her. Now, 5 years later, she still tunes into Dali for inspiration when she gets stuck. 

You can choose who you want for your ultimate mentors and you can change them around as much as you like. The 'mentor' doesn't have to be an ideal role model, as long as they have some admirable qualities, and you can focus on any element in their profile.

You can also add school teachers or mentors of your youth, relatives on the other side, or anyone who can help you with a particularly tough spot. Think of anyone you admire: Maya Angelou, Stephen Hawking, Bessie Smith, Sir Edmond Hillary, Steve Jobs, Thomas Edison...

Try it out.  They can be as real as you want them to be.
Ask them a few questions and see what comes up.  Have fun with it.  Let me know how it goes for you.

If you're interested in learning the tool, I'll be happy to set up a time to work it with you.  Just hit reply to this message, and I will send you the link.

When I want to test my edges and jump into something innovative, I call on Steve Jobs to encourage me to go the step beyond.

Even once in awhile, when I'm in a really cynical mood, and feeling quite bold, I call on Mark Twain to inspire me with a witty comeback. 

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Is everything feeling wonky in the new energy?  5 guidelines to get into your Zen.

2/12/2021

 
With all the things going on, there is some new energy in the Universe, and on Mother Earth, it was well needed and earned.  I needed to tune in - to my higher self, my inner voice, the earth, my guides, and divine support. 

I rested, meditated, got creative, and did all the things I needed to do. 
Then in January, when I was ready to hit the ground running, I got a loud and clear message from my guides: 

"Stop!!  We still have more for you to do."

I argued.   But I did all those things.   I spent quality time with my spouse.  I took naps, I made my lists of intentions for the year, I caught up with relatives and friends over the phone.  I even had a 4-hour visit from my stepson and his partner. 

Oh, wait....  I guess they mean that I didn't spend enough time looking within. 

OK, I get it. In the giant scope of things and enlightenment, awakening and alignment with soul's purpose, I must have forgotten something. It's on a much bigger scale than just me and my clients. I've got a role in this thing.  I'm still developing spiritually, and yes, I think we all are.

So, I crawled back into my den and took another couple of weeks of winter hibernation.  I'm not kidding. I drew the oracle card Brown Bear Spirit which said just that.
Spend more time in your den.

So here's the deal...

There is a new energy transforming the earth and us.  And we have to get ready for it. 

You may notice some shifts.  That's you connecting to this energy. 

Things might feel a little wonky.  That's you not quite connecting to this energy - yet.

Be patient.  You'll get the hang of all of this.  If not sooner, then later.


So here's the part where I give you some hints.  - Are you ready?

Be present - Wherever you find yourself, be in the moment.  If you're pissed off, frustrated, your inner 3-year-old is pitching a fit, be present in that moment.  It's not easy.  You might be stuck in Day 286 of lockdown or if you're adjusting to life after reintegration... be present

Allow whatever wants to come -   You might get inspiration, you might have to release some old patterns, your junk drawer might want to be cleared out. On the other hand, you might be getting messages in weird cryptic code... allow it to come.

Be kind to yourself -  When things are tough, we tend to beat ourselves up.  Don't do it.
Allow yourself a nap, some chocolate, a shot of Bailey's, a good long cry, a pep talk, whatever.  You know what you need. Give your inner child what she needs.

Schedule time for yourself -  This is important.  Take 10 - 20 minutes every day for yourself, doing what helps you to tune in. You don't have to meditate. It can be 10 minutes in your cozy chair with hot cocoa or coffee, a walk, your favorite music, jogging, dancing, headbanging*, reading a good book, whatever inspires you.  Make it non-negotiable. 

Say no to anything that doesn't feel right -  This can be anything you don't like.  A friend asking for a favor; your neighbor complaining about where you put the trash can;  the asshole ahead of you in the checkout, not wearing a mask; the evening news; the project that you really don't want to do; another glass of wine (note that this could also be in the Yes category).  

So the turnaround is to say yes to what feels right, and so no to what doesn't.
It might take you a while to get the feel of this.

That should get you started for now.

Be open and prepared.  2021 is bringing in some amazing energy and more is coming.  It's all good, but those of us who are prepared and go with the flow will have a better time of it.

We've all been through the wringer - and if anyone says they haven't, they're probably lying. It's been rough, but the easiest way to deal with it is to find your Zen in the equation and follow it. Follow whatever lights you up. 

Learn what it takes to make you feel good and accept it when you don't.  That's the trick.

I'm going to be posting some more tips and tricks to support the steps above on my Facebook group so you'll want to join.
 
Soul Adventure Network

If you need any help along the way or have any questions on any of the steps or anything else, please comment below or message me at terri@terrihofstetter.com I will try to answer your question. I'll walk you through it if I can. 





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 Photo courtesy of Matt Houghton - Unsplash

There's something better around the corner - find out how...

8/11/2020

 
I looked back to where I was 11 years ago – I was frustrated with my job, constantly complaining about not feeling valued, working beyond my job description, and way under my pay level…  I kept changing jobs hoping for more success and to get paid to do the work I loved. I would end up in the same situation with a different job title. It was a pattern. I would enjoy the job for 6 months to a year, then I would feel that I wasn’t recognized for the work that I did. 

….it’s clear that I wasn’t doing the work I loved. It was just the next best thing that allowed me to keep my health plan and benefits.  It never occurred to me that I could make a living doing what I loved – my life’s work – and I would look forward to it every day. I hid in the same belief system for over a decade.
I wanted a sign from the Universe – I really did – but didn’t have a clue that the Universe was sending me lots of signs, winks, and visions of what my life would be like.  I just didn’t see them.

A friend once told me that God speaks to us, and when we don’t listen, God turns up the volume.

Sometimes the signs can be a clear message that where we’re at now is not where we need to be, and there is something better around the corner.

The Universe is winking at us, waving at us, beckoning us to something more tasty and delightful - even for a little while - to lure us onto another path.  If we don’t choose to take it, the only alternative is to point out more reasons why it’s advantageous to leave.

My work with my clients is to provide a path, identifying what their guides are leading them to, and guide them to identify a way get there, step by step – before it’s time to bail.  We will do deep soul work as I help my clients to listen to their own intuition and guide them in the steps on the journey, identifying what is calling them. 

If this resonates with you, then schedule a 20-min chat with me and you can find out more about where you’re being led. 



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photo = Becca Tapert - unsplash

What’s nudging you - - and what’s triggering you?

5/20/2020

 

Are things as wacky for you as they are for the rest of us??  You are not alone.

What I've realized is that as shifts are happening, and we're adapting to the new transition, the new age, we have to grow into it.  Well, I knew this intellectually, but as I see it happening to me, and my clients and my circle of friends, it's starting to make sense.  

As we know, once things get back to normal, it most likely won't be the 'normal' that we knew before.  Another thing is that we may not want to go back to that old form of normal anyway. 

How we're slowing down, getting more time to think, reorganizing our daily lives to fit what's happening in our worlds, we start thinking.  We rearrange our furniture, clear out old junk, touch up things, spend more time reading, interacting with our spouses or children more….   

We notice things.  We notice what we want to do differently; what we want to stop doing; what we want to start doing; and what we'd rather have for dinner on Tuesday.  Suddenly, out of the blue, you may have had a craving for something, and urge to dust off a book and start reading.   
Shifts…

Maybe we're really ambitious and want to rush ourselves into major household projects or to write that book we always wanted to.  Great.  But only if it feels right.  Don't try to jump into it just because you think you should.

So, you're asking me, "Terri, what's this about nudges and triggers?"

Well, as our lives change drastically – and most of ours have – things start getting icky, or prickly, or out of adjustment.  Suddenly, the chair in the den is in the wrong place; the way your neighbor walks out his front door irks you, a conversation rubs you the wrong way, or the dude at the grocery store on Aisle 4 suddenly pisses you off.  In most cases, these things roll off your back, but if it irks you, then it might be a chance to take note of what is getting to you.

These triggers are calling to your attention something that might be out of alignment and need adjusting in your life.  My client had a situation with one of the PTA moms and she couldn't figure out why it bent her the wrong way.  She had to examine where it showed in a pattern with something she dealt with before.  It connected to some old beliefs about her integrity that challenged her.
A tweak here or there…

We're all evolving, advancing and learning, and when this happens, come opportunities for growth – and in order to grow, we sometimes have to remove things in our lives that no longer serve us.  When we clear out old dishes in the cabinet, maybe they are a metaphor for something bigger.  Or maybe, we just need space.

On the other hand, when we see that we're starting to become enlightened, or clearing out old thoughts and beliefs, and we revert or have a relapse, it's highly disappointing. In a previous conversation, it occurred to me that yes, we might be evolving, but even the Dalai Lama gets angry. We only see Deepak Chopra on a good day, and he probably gets in a funk now and then, too.  

Back to the slowing down theme.  As you might recall, I had surgery several weeks ago.  It was perfect timing in that we were supposed to be home anyway, and I had an excuse to rest.  During the first 2 weeks, I lavished in 3 hours' worth of naps a day. I set time for a ½ hour nap daily after that.  I enjoyed watching the clouds from my lounge chair in the garden.  Then, quietly, I started getting faint nudges from the Universe. There is something more out there.  However, the naps are what allowed the new ideas to come in.

What I noticed once I went 'back to work' was that I got less done per day, and I'm still not back to the old production level.  I was disappointed with myself, but it sure felt good. I'm feeling more creative and enjoying it. Sometimes I find that when I take the time to relax, go for walks and work in the garden, I get more accomplished in one hour at my desk than I used to get in half a day.  (Like this newsletter, for example…)

I'm finding more things to throw out, physically and mentally.  I sometimes have to stop everything and work on some thoughts and throw them in the trash can, too.  Then, I get a few more nudges.  I'm not sure what they mean, but I know it will all be clear sooner or later.  I'm growing into something and being guided.  I can't wait to see what I'm becoming.
The main thing I have noticed – and I find it's the same with my fellow coaches, I want to start some new classes, maybe a new program or group… but in order to do that, I have to go through some shifts to see what that is.  My soul needs some healing, along with my body lately.  

What I'd like to see all of you take with you is that this shift is going to take some time and we may not jump into it all at once. As we develop, we will see changes, but not necessarily recognize them right away.

Allow yourself to be what you need to be now.  Be present for what is. Notice what you need, what you feel, and allow yourself to feel it.   Allow yourself to find out who you are becoming.



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Photo by Caleb George on Unsplash                                       Photo by allison griffith on Unsplash


How to keep your sense of Inner Peace by ignoring other people’s opinions

5/21/2019

 
My mother often said “You’ll never see these people again anyway…” She used this any time my sisters or I were concerned about what people may think, particularly on vacation when we were having a bad hair day. 
What she meant was that she didn’t want us to base our values on the opinions of others. She was an amazing mentor.  She did what she wanted and wasn’t concerned about what people thought.

Remember when you were in high school and everyone was wearing Calvin’s, Esprit or Tommy Hilfiger? Or anyone who was anyone was on the cheer leading squad or football team, because everyone. was. Tanya Davis who gossiped about everyone annoyed you, but still, you didn’t dare want to be the subject of her rumors, because everyone. might believe her.

Living in Germany over 25 years has made me fully aware of how strong peer pressure is, even for grown adults. Not that folks are excessively fashion conscious, but many solely value the opinions of others. I see people, every spring, looking in their neighbor’s yards to see what flowers they put out; or cemetery plots to make sure theirs is as nice as everyone else’s; or checking first before making their own decisions. It’s rather amusing, that even a choice of flowers depends on someone else, and can’t be original.

Back in 2003, I read Martha Beck’s Finding Your Own North Star, long before I took the leap to be a life coach.  Among the inspiration and fabulous coaching tools, one chapter in particular was Who Is Your Everyone? Martha Beck explains that many of us hold ourselves back from doing our own thing, what our inner self is guiding us to do, because we’re afraid of what people might think. Chances are your ‘everyone’ is a small minority of people you don’t want to hang out with anyway. The people who think like you, love you and support you, are the people whose opinions you should honor, if anyone’s.

Recently, my friend Emm, also a life coach, told me about a magazine article her colleague wrote for the publishing company where she works.  Her colleague received a brazen, hateful comment from a local critic. No one knew who the guy was, yet it was hurtful. 
Emm said she empathized for her coworker, and yes, glad it didn’t happen to her; yet, she knew that no one took it very seriously.

Did this one person represent everyone’s opinion?  We explored the situation for a while, thinking of how we would react to various forms of criticism.  You can ask yourself these questions in any situation.


Would we value the critic’s opinion?

Would we question our own worthiness?

Would we take it personally?

Do we need this person’s approval?

Would it spoil your entire day or week?

 
 
 
Are you trying to be like everyone else or are you dancing to the beat of your own drum? 



Rebecca Campbell says, “Don’t dim to fit in.”
Wayne Dyer said, “Self-actualized people are independent of the good opinion of others.”
 
 
Think about how much you question your own inner self based on the opinions of others.
Then think about how you can change your self belief by looking within and finding what your inner self says.


  Do you want to blend in with the crowd ......  or find your own tribe... ???




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How to manifest your dream life in 5 steps.

4/10/2019

 

I came across a great formula for manifesting, that hit me rather like a slam as I was preparing a presentation.  I've used it for decades without realizing it;  so simple and easy to apply that I incorporated into a 5 step plan. 
 
I used it with myself as an example, and someone you would know, say, Freddie Mercury, so you can see it as it works.
 
 
1)  Find out what you want 
 
Even if you don’t know what your ultimate dream is, you can find something small that you want right now. 
At a point in my life at about 30, I didn’t know what I wanted in my life, I just wanted out of the rut I was in.  I found out what I wanted for today, or this weekend – perhaps to go for a walk in the woods or a bike ride along the river.  I knew each day, slowly, my life had improved.  What I didn’t know was that I was inching my way to the life I wanted.
 
Freddy always knew what he wanted, or it appears that way.  He lived for his music, to be a rock star – and he got it.
 
 
2)  Find your team of soul buddies
 
Hang out with like-minded people who support you.
I found an outdoor program, where I could go on hiking trips and enjoy a group of people who also enjoyed what I did. I knew I was happy, and slowly discovering my passion.  It led me to meeting new people and eventually my life partner.
 
Freddie had Queen.  The band supported and encouraged him and created together.
 
 
3)  Follow your passion
 
Whatever your passion is – what makes you feel joy, even for a while - do it as often as possible.
My passion changes, too.  At that early time in my life, I discovered snowboarding.  I couldn’t afford to go very often, but I signed up on budget group trips with the outdoor program, and kept going.  I felt exhilarated when I was gliding on the snow.  I knew in those moments, I had found utter bliss.
Freddy, of course, had his passion in music, and most of the pieces he wrote, had a connection in his soul. 
 
 
4)  Set an intention
 
When you know what you want, write it down, and allow the Universe or the Divine to bring it to you.   Hint: It helps if you forget about it.
 
After all the time spent with my new friends, eventually something was missing in my life – a partner. 
I wrote down a wish for a man who enjoyed all the things I loved, and would be compatible with me.  Within 3 months, I was dating a man who shared my passions. We’ve been happily married for 11 years.
I met him within a week of writing it down, but somehow forgotten about my wish. I found it written 2 years later.  
 
I’m sure Freddie set intentions, too.  Whether he wrote them down, or stated them, he achieved everything he set out to do.  
 
 
5)  Just say no
 
Say no to anything that goes against your dream or goal.  Listen to your heart.  Set your boundaries.
I don’t listen to anyone who prevents me from doing what I want to do.


Freddie argued with record companies, the band and anyone else who tried to convince him of doing something he didn’t want.
 
 
See if this works for you, try it, and play around with the steps.  If you can do it most of the time, following your passion, you’ll be on the right track. 

I'd love to hear how it works for you.  Please comment below with your experience. 

Learn more by connecting with me and other like-minded souls on Facebook - Soul Adventure Network
 
 


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Why not stop and have a coffee?

2/22/2019

 
You’ll hear this phrase often in Europe.  
 
You’ll be on the Autobahn and stressed in a traffic jam, and someone in the car says, “Let’s pull over at the next rest stop for a coffee.”

After a stressful day of errands or shopping for household furnishings, shoes, or whatever, your friend says, “Let’s stop at a café for a coffee.”

You had a rough day at work and come home stressed.  Your partner or roommate greets you in the kitchen, “Here, I’ll make a coffee.”

You have long line in security at the airport, or stressful train connection.  You have a few minutes until the next boarding time. Your travel buddy suggests, “Why don’t we pop over there for a coffee?”
 
All of these mean roughly the same thing:  stop… shift gears… relax a minute… take some time to regroup.  To a European, the meaning is clear.  An American might think about stopping at Starbucks for a to-go cup, but Europeans know when it’s time to relax, and answer the call.  No one has to explain it.  It’s all understood.
 
Of course, coffee could mean two friends meeting up to catch up and connect, a chat with a coworker, or relaxing on a vacation between sights; but in any case, the coffee is simply an excuse to stop and regroup. 
It could be a tea, a smoothie or hot cocoa, but the meaning is the same.  Of course, at cafes in Europe, there are other options to chose from.
 
Something magical happens. You make a pause in your day.  In a period of 10 – 20 minutes, the body slows down, whatever is behind us is temporarily forgotten, and most problems are solved.  In some cases, one can go back to what they were doing before, and everything magically works out.
 
On a metaphysical level, something happens in the body, mind and soul.  You hand everything over to an unseen force and let it go or release.  On a scientific level, your body might be creating new neurons in your brain and ceasing to repeat uncomfortable thought patterns.  On a physical level, your muscles start to relax and your heart rate slows.  On a spiritual level, you are handing over your problems to the Divine.  
It’s a shift to something, and it means much more than a hot beverage.
 
It’s not all about coffee. It could be a walk in the woods, a sit on a park bench, meditation or breath work.  
See how you can incorporate this practice in your life.  Try it – you might enjoy it.  


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Are you on the Hero’s Call to Adventure?

9/21/2018

 
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If you’re familiar with Joseph Campbell, you might be thinking the Hero’s Call to Adventure is something more like a lightening bolt or burning bush reality, and you’re waiting for a video from a princess and the Imperial Army to destroy your village or a tornado to zap you to Oz. Though sometimes hero’s journeys can feel almost fictional,, they aren’t always so dramatic.

A current day example I like to use is The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, where after 20 years in a no-so-rewarding job, he gets thrown into a process of downsizing, and frustrated and hopeless, he runs off onto a hopeless quest. Sometimes, it’s even more subtle.

We’ve been dreaming of venturing into something new, and wish we could just quit, but suck it up for another year or two, waiting for a better opportunity for fall into our lap. Maybe subtle opportunities and hints have popped up. One of my fellow coaches happened upon a Labrador retriever and began actively hiking in the woods to keep him engaged; which led her to taking a hunting course, and studying more about nature and environment. She’s still following the path and not sure where it’s leading her.

My friend Justin had been frustrated in his engineering job for years. He lived a colorful personal life of traveling Europe and following jazz festivals and culture events, always dreaming of organizing some kind of business to support travel and music in order to share his hobby with others. He suddenly was forced into retirement a few years early, opening the door to pursue his passion and start his business.

My knock on the door came from the outdoor program with US Army Recreation, inspired by my coworker, Mike. I eventually volunteered, leading to becoming a snowboard instructor, meeting my future husband, and discovering my gift of helping people to feel at ease out of their comfort zones. I always wanted to lead people on adventure trips as a career, but didn’t know where to start.

When the crash hit, where I became the victim of downsizing several years later, I was ready to switch from victim to hero and willingly jumped into the abyss. Still not sure where to go from there, I accepted each new assignment, sometimes not so eagerly, waiting and watching for further instructions.


Mind you, I’m still taking on new assignments, and following my journey, not sure where it will take me next.


If you’re wondering if you’re on a hero’s call, here a couple of signs to watch out for:


  • you have a vague feeling that you want to do something adventurous in your life
  • you keep feeling like something is tapping you on the shoulder or tugging at your sleeve
  • the more you try to relax, you feel more trapped in your current situation
  • you have found yourself curious or intrigued about something you’ve never been interested in before
  • you’ve always longed for something, but it seemed to far out of reach
  • You want to jump off the train you’re on, but are terrified of the unknown ahead of you
  • Your hobby or passion is taking hold of you and you can’t imagine not doing it


So what do you do with this? I suggest you keep watching for signs, following anything intriguing that falls into your path or steers you in another direction. If you feel like you’re sold out in your current job, keep this awareness and watch for clues, reminding yourself that you don’t have to do this. There is something coming.

How do you know when it’s time to take the leap of faith? Basically, when you’re back is against the wall, and you know you can’t stay. When you know to continue on is more painful than the risk of the unknown, it’s time.

In my case, I suspected I was getting the call, but still thought I needed a safety net. “I can’t quit without a back up job, even something part-time. That would be stupid.” I really was watching for Han Solo and OB-1 to show up, with a ship. Then I was given the choice to take a cut in pay or relocate eighty miles from home. It was a move to save the company from paying severance. I knew it was time. I realized sometimes we just have to leap.


If any of this hits home for you, I’d love to talk to you. Set up a 30 minute chat with me here.











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    Terri Hofstetter

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